No mom is an island

Last night I found myself trying desperately to come up with my New Year’s resolution at the last minute. I wanted something that would be a noticeable change, but also something achievable. Then it hit me - I should resolve to rely less on my “village” and do more for myself. I fell into a blissful sleep at 11:30 (yes, this is how lame I have become.)

I have been lucky to have an amazing support system. Sean and I both have parents that are willing to help out at the drop of a hat. Not to mention extended family, friends, and coworkers who have helped babysit, dragged us out of the house for an evening out, or answered our dumb parenting questions without laughing at us. I have even been utilizing the YMCA drop-in daycare for anything from a quick work out to an afternoon of housework.

Lately, I have started to worry that I rely too heavily on these people. I have been afraid that other people will find out that I can’t do everything by myself… I am far from a supermom. Especially as a stay-at-home mom, the guilt of not being able to finish everything has really set in. I have found myself thinking, “It should not be this hard to keep the cupboards full, house clean, and everyone in clean clothes. I don’t even work outside this house and I only have one child!”

Last night shortly after I made my resolution, I awoke to Kelan screaming. It turned out to be what I call a dig deep night (which means Kelan was up more than he was asleep), with what Sean and I assume was teething pain. Somewhere around three thirty in the morning, watching Sean rock Kelan, I started thinking. The reason I have my sanity is because of all of the help I get. I know that tomorrow if I need a quick nap, I can ask for it. I’m not sure I want to feel bad about not being able to do everything alone… not with perks like naps!

So instead of resolving to be more independent, I think my new year’s resolution will be to pay it forward - to be a helpful villager in someone else’s life. As many of my friends embark on this parenting adventure, I will offer my assistance in babysitting, advice, or dragging them out for an evening of fun. There. That wasn’t so hard. Happy 2009!